I’m as incompetent as the Mets

How I forget this headline from my last rant about the Mets is as appalling as the headline itself:

Livan Hernandez to first base?

There are occasions when a team might use a starting pitcher as a pinch hitter. Typically, the pitcher in question pinch hits for a relief pitcher (who gets very few plate appearances) when the team is trying to conserve a bench player or is out of bench players. Livan Hernandez has a lifetime batting average of .228, which is pretty good for a pitcher. So Livan Hernandez might be a guy a manager would consider using to pinch hit for a relief pitcher in a special circumstance.


Livan Hernandez’s role is first and foremost to act as a starting pitcher. Livan Hernandez is a terrible in this capacity. He should not be on any major league roster, as a pitcher, let alone as an option in the field. The fact that Jerry Manuel, the Mets’ manager, suggested to a member of the media that Livan Hernandez could be used at first base implies a level of roster mismanagement that is incomprehensible. The fact that this came up in any conversation is proof to me that Mets’ management is entirely devoid of competence and should be not be allowed to make any decisions of consequence.

Quantifying American Arrogance

As a scientist, I’m always looking for ways to quantify the seemingly unquantifiable. I think it’s safe to say that Americans are, whether justifiably or not, arrogant. But what portion of Americans are arrogant? A recent CBS poll finally revealed the answer:
[Palin Poll]
That’s right, 76% of Americans think they can decipher the capricious whims of Sarah Palin. The best I could manage was something about the industrial revolution and a puppy.

In other news, by CBS News math, 52 + 24 + 14 = 100. Furthermore, showed their financial prowess by ritualistically setting more than $732,000 on fire.