Realm of the Wombat

BoingBoing.net has reported sightings of cars covered in computer keys in the LoCal area. Here’s the original, and then someone else pointed out this Homer Simpson specimen.

Here’s another automobile that I saw before sans camera. Thus, when Jim Dandy and I spotted it at a stoplight, I wasted no time pulling the camera out of my bag to capture the image. JD was impressed by my deft movement, but when you’ve been in this business as long as I have, you become quick on the trigger.

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[Click any of the images for an enlargement]

In our never ending quest to see America, Melissa, Odie, and I drove to the Avenue of the Giants, a 230 mile jaunt up US 101. As you can see on the map, we start at the lower center portion of NorCal and end up at the top right, pretty much in a suburb of Oregon.

Odie and Melissa had their spirits up for the trip. Thoroghly sick of driving, I offered my opinion of the prospect of sitting behind the wheel for 10 hours this day. In fact, my participation in this trip was contingent on Odie driving.

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The Hulk movie was filmed partly in Berkeley, so it’s fitting that someone would decorate their car in homage. It’s a hybrid even!

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Normally I wouldn’t do this, but what’s below was an email forward from Dandy Malec, and I want to do my part to stick it to a bunch of republicans like Neiman-Marcus. Enjoy.

This is a true story.

My daughter and I had just finished a salad at a Neiman-Marcus Cafe in Dallas, and we decided to have a small dessert. Because both of us are such cookie lovers, we decided to try the”Neiman-Marcus cookie.” It was so excellent that I asked if they would give me the recipe, and the waitress said with a small frown, “I’m afraid not, but you can buy the recipe.

Well, I asked how much, and she responded, “Only two fifty-it’s a great deal!”

I agreed to that, and told her to just add it to my tab. Thirty days later, I received my VISA statement, and the Neiman-Marcus charge was $285.00! I looked again, and I remembered I had only spent $9.95 for two salads and about $20.00 for a scarf. As I glanced at the bottom of the statement, it said, “Cookie Recipe - $250.00″. That was outrageous!

I called Neiman’s Accounting Department and told them the waitress said it was “two fifty”, which clearly does not mean “two hundred and fifty dollars” by any reasonable interpretation of the phrase. Neiman-Marcus refused to budge.

They would not refund my money because, according to them, “What the waitress told you is not our problem. You have already seen the recipe. We absolutely will not refund your money at this point.”

I explained to the Accounting Department lady the criminal statutes which govern fraud in the state of Texas. I threatened to report them to the Better Business Bureau and the Texas attorney General’s office for engaging in fraud.

I was basically told, “Do what you want. Don’t bother thinking of how you can get even, and don’t bother trying to get any of your money back.” I just said, Okay, you folks got my $250, and now I’m going t! o have $250 worth of fun.” I told her that I was going to see to it that every cookie lover in the United States with an e-mail account has a $250 cookie recipe from Neiman-Marcus…for free.

She replied, “I wish you wouldn’t do this.”

I said, “Well, perhaps you should have thought of that before you ripped me off!” and slammed down the phone. So here it is! Please, please, please pass it on to everyone you can possibly think of. I paid $250 for this, and I don’t want Neiman-Marcus to EVER make another penny off of this recipe!

NEIMAN-MARCUS COOKIES (Recipe may be halved)
2 cups butter
24 oz. chocolate chips
4 cups flour
2 cups brown sugar
2 tsp. soda
1 tsp. salt
2 cups sugar
1 8 oz Hershey Bar (grated)
5 cups blended oatmeal
4 eggs
2 tsp. baking powder
2 tsp. vanilla
3 cups chopped nuts (your choice)

Measure oatmeal, and blend in a blender to a fine powder. Cream the butter and both sugars. Add eggs and vanilla, mix together with flour, oatmeal, salt, baking powder, and soda. Add chocolate chips, Hershey Bar, and nuts. Roll into balls, and place two inches apart on a cookie sheet. Bake for 10 minutes at 375 degrees. Makes 112 cookies.

Sounds great right? Maybe this actually happened, but this very recipe is available at the Neiman-Marcus website. Of course it could be a savvy PR person preventing backlash by claiming the above story was an urban legend. The world may never know.

I’ve been having problems with milk lately. Most grocery stores (Albertsons, Safeway) offer a substantial discount if you buy two gallons of milk. I use a lot of milk because I eat two bowls of cereal every morning for breakfast, so I probably consume milk at the same rate as a small family. Thus, I usually win the race with the expiration date. Recently however, the second gallon of milk has been going bad only a couple of days after opening, up to 5 days before the expiration date. At first I thought it was just a bad batch of milk; then it seemed to only happen with milk purchased at Safeway. But after a string of early sourings from Albertsons, I reopened my search for the true culprit, and that search took me to the back of my refrigerator. There I discovered that our thermostat was set to the warmest temperature, probably accidentally altered when I threw a loaf of bread back there. After a day at a higher setting, the fridge is noticeably cooler and hopefully this will result in extended milk freshness.

To be honest, I’m a bit embarrassed that it took me so long to figure this out. Apparently I wasn’t able to extrapolate the wise words of Barry Bonds, “You need to clean out your closets before you start trying to clean mine!” from winter coat storage areas to low temperature food storage devices.

I’ve been pretty lax about posting new words that I’ve found in my readings. Here’s an update:

From Reading Lolita in Tehran:

From Guns, Germs, and Steel:

From Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom:

I think this is a science-fiction book that approaches something we could imagine in our lifetime, and then pushes the envelope a little further. Basically people are fused with wireless technology, sort of a hyper-Blackberry type device implanted in your head, for communication and access to the internet 24/7 directly via the brain. This brain-computer interface allows also for memory back-up and transfer to another body, such as a clone of yourself, to achieve immortality in essence. Money as we know it is replaced by “Whuffie,” which is sort of currency of reputation. Society is already moving toward this lifestyle with cellular and wi-fi devices all over the place, and I can completely see somebody embedding them inside their bodies and making them CNS responsive. Immortality via clones I’m not so sure about.

A couple of interesting points from Down and Out:

Cory Doctorow’s site: craphound.com

I read The Hitchhiker’s Guide a few years back with the intention of reading the entire five part trilogy. I think I made it through the second part, but sputtered midway through the third. The recent movie version rekindled my interest, so I revisited the sci-fi classic. It’s probably the best book that destroys the Earth in the first 20 pages. There’s some cute humor, a few jabs at government and philosophy, and a unique creation story. I’m not sure if this was intended at all, but the theme that comes to me is not to take ourselves too seriously. If that’s the point, then maybe I should read it again.